September 9, 2007; 10:22 AM- Book Review for Barbara Tuchman's The Guns of August assigned.

I am 5 feet tall, almost 5'1", so people will always describe me as "tiny".  Until the middle of tenth grade I weighed just about 105 pounds, and worried constantly about dropping that extra 5.   When I was taken off Adderall and the side effects of Risperdal and Lithium began to kick in, I gained 10 pounds.  Since then, I fluctuate at about 117 pounds.

I'm not fat, but I'm not so skinny, either.  I could proabably be healthier and get in shape, but I love my body.  I feel... whole, the extra pounds feel luxuriant.  When I was skinnier I was critical of how I looked.  I never felt so much like a queen as I do now.

 Dear Paul,
I really liked you in "Hud", the way you almost raped Patricia Neal was very convincing.  By the way, can I have $40,000 to attend Kenyon College?...

Dear Mr. Newman,
Congratulations on another birthday! Honestly, you don't look a day over 81...

Dear Sir:
Please allow me to express what I tremendous fan I am of your work.  "The Sting" is a cult classic in my family and among my friends, and your preformance in "Hud" should have won you that Oscar. (Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid was a bit of a disappointment, though...

Dear Paul Newman,
It is such an honor to write to you.  Since I was twelve years old I admired both your talent and your dynamic.  "The Sting" is a cult classic in my family and among my friends (you shot Robert Redford! He shot you! But wait, it was all part of the scheme!).  I enjoyed every minute of "Hud", in which the severity of your character moved me to raise my standards of men.  That moment when you beg Patricia Neal at the bus station not to leave you brought tears to my eyes- the emotion you conveyed, coupled with the stark black and white of the picture, was breath taking.  You are an iconic actor, and you make a mean salad dressing.

I am writing to you to ask for financial aid concerning my post-high school education.  Just as I imagine the way you were when you were 17, I am not content to go to just any school, which is why I've set my heart on Kenyon, your alma mater.  At Kenyon, I know that I will receive the highest quality training and the greatest nurturing for my passsions- the same you received, sir.   Please help me make the fluidity of your hands be mirrored in the fluidity of my words, let the refinement of your character be the refinement of my thesis, allow the passion in your voice echo in the passion in my style.   Please help me be the best writer/literature major I can be by giving me $40,000 for tuition.   I promise to live up to the standards set by Kenyon's alumn.

Your fan, Maddie Ellis
(Incidentely, wasn't Patricia Neal supposed to be black in that movie?)

AP English: My classmates are illiterate
Free Mods: the librarians can be freaking annoying
IB Psych: I have experienced three of the six modern psychological perspectives
IB History: Everyone else knows more about WWI than me. Discuss!
Lunch: scholastic ineptitude robs me of my appetite
Chorus: 90% of my classmates are fuckwads
Dance: I suck at dance
French: I suck at French

Bonus!
Yearbook: I am in way over my head.  Also, freshman must die.